understanding

  • Accidentally

    My dad left only about two hours ago, and already I have realized that I accidentally left my handicapped parking placard in his vehicle.  I suppose this is one accident less than the two from his visit just weeks before, when he accidentally took my spare keys and accidentally left his air mattress and pump.

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  • It isn’t easy for me to be vulnerable. I remember a friend from cohort saying to me once that I was very open by not very vulnerable, and I was upset by that statement, because I didn’t think it fair to separate the two out in that manner.  Being honest was, in my mind at

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  • Avoidance

    I’m supposed to be paying bills. But there isn’t enough money. So, I am doing this thing that I do.  Some like to call it procrastination, but I’ve started to use terms that are more honest wherever possible, so this thing is called “avoidance”. When the thing cannot be done comfortably, efficiently, without stress, or

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  • I See Stupid People

    There’s this M. Night Shyamalan movie that has an monologue that a friend and I once transformed a bit.  We took the word “dead” and inserted “stupid”. I see stupid people.  They’re all around me.  They don’t know they’re stupid. Today I have been dealing with the frustration of not being able to express my

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  • Wide Awake

    I woke to a crash at 5:00 this morning.  My daughter’s cat has finally managed to do what I have been anticipating for some weeks now—she broke some shit. I investigated the crash and found that the beautiful orchid that was thoughtfully gifted to me after my recent hip surgery was currently lying on the

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  • Food Chain

    I’ve watched this progression happening inside my home over the past month or so.  The container garden in my sun porch at some point brought little flying bugs into the environment.  Whether they came from the soil or from the great outdoors is unclear, but they arrived, nonetheless.  And I have tried several remedies that

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  • Too Much

    Yesterday was too much. In fact, the too much started the day before, and I didn’t do a good job of mitigating it at the outset.  But who is great at mitigating, really? On Thursday, when I took the bus to the doctor, there was so much chaos.  There was a woman who insisted her

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  • Muchness

    There is a line in Lewis Carroll’s tales of Alice’s Adventures that reads: “‎You’re not the same as you were before,” he said. You were much more… muchier… you’ve lost your muchness.” I’ve often liked that line, spoken to Alice about the ways that she has changed.  And though the point of Carroll’s writing was

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  • Shifting

    I was talking with my dad yesterday, and our conversation turned toward the topic of change.  Particularly, we were talking about what it takes to change your mind—to move toward a new idea or concept and abandon your previous thinking.  And that discussion led to some thought about how my own progression and development of

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  • Backward

    The last few days I haven’t been able to keep control of my letters.  They keep switching up and making the words I mean to write a jumbled mess.  And this is not figurative in any way.  I’m seriously dyslexic of late. It isn’t a major issue, since we have these lovely computer checks of

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