Learning To Be Whole

mental illness

  • And the Storm Rages On

    It isn’t easy for me to be vulnerable. I remember a friend from cohort saying to me once that I was very open by not very vulnerable, and I was upset by that statement, because I didn’t think it fair to separate the two out in that manner.  Being honest was, in my mind at

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  • Avoidance

    I’m supposed to be paying bills. But there isn’t enough money. So, I am doing this thing that I do.  Some like to call it procrastination, but I’ve started to use terms that are more honest wherever possible, so this thing is called “avoidance”. When the thing cannot be done comfortably, efficiently, without stress, or

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  • I Should Be Packing Right Now

    The journey to this moment has been long and hard and chaotic and sometimes frightening.  So, now that I am here, I am paralyzed. This is certainly not the first time that I have fought my way through all sorts of trauma to find myself safe on the other side and stuck.  Just stuck.  It

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  • Five Common Arguments Against Watching 13 Reasons Why, and Why, as a Survivor, I Reject Them

      Recently, the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why has created what I wish were helpful conversations on my Facebook feed.  But, more often than not, the people who are posting are educators of middle and high school students in small towns.  The reasons why I have those sorts of educators on my feed are simple—I

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  • Sleepwalker

    I once, according to my dad’s telling of the tale, came downstairs from my room, obtained a jar of jam from the refrigerator, took a spoon from the silverware drawer, and started to eat jam directly from the jar.  When Dad questioned me, and asked what I was doing, I became defensive.  Whatever was happening

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  • Like You Mean It

    My daughter and I were having a conversation the other day about my marketable skills. I will spare you the details and the discouraging situation that I find myself in regarding balancing health and finances.  If you have not already become familiar with that situation, hit up some earlier posts to get up to speed.

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  • More Than I Can Handle

      There is this common statement among those who choose a Christian religious base for their belief system.  I hear it often.  I hate it more every time it is said. “God won’t give you more than you can handle.” I call bullshit. I am dealing with more than I can handle.  I’ve been dealing

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  • Documented

    Documents and documenting are serious themes in the past few weeks to months.  It is interesting to me the ways that we are forced or encouraged or inspired to document, and all the different reasons that are used to justify or explain that documentation. I recently had to make a trip to my local office

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  • Pills

    This morning I asked the dog, “Wouldn’t my mother be proud of me, swallowing up to 11 pills at once?” Shockingly, he responded by turning his head to one side and looking at me with cuteness and confusion, wondering if I were asking him something he wanted to hear … he hasn’t mastered English language

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  • Some things never change

    I’m sort of a change addict.  I rearrange things all the time.  From the files in my office to the paints in my studio to the furniture in the rooms to the items on my bedside table, I am always looking for another way to place things.  And I often like to pretend that it

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