chronic illness
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Yesterday I received a rude message. It made accusations against me, because I had posted on Facebook both an update to my fundraiser, requesting donations to pay bills in May, and a request for pictures of items my mother had painted, to utilize at my tattoo consultation. In the mind of the one offering the
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I think that this title is somewhat of a “dirty” word. Most of us think of it in terms of restrictions and frustrations and defeats. I know that is how I often view dieting. This is also a somewhat new concern for me. I am one of those people who was born fit and stayed
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I am scheduled for a mammogram later today. I’ve spent about the last 2 hours debating with myself about whether I do or do not wish to reschedule that appointment. I can make it. But I don’t want to worry about it. But I feel well enough. No, I don’t feel well. But I could
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Once in a while I sit and reflect. Just be. In the silence, alone, waiting, and living inside my own head. It is a different feeling, this reflection, because usually I am always thinking, in the most deliberate of ways, but without conscious effort. My mind just doesn’t stop. I’m constantly assessing—for threats, I assume,
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This morning I asked the dog, “Wouldn’t my mother be proud of me, swallowing up to 11 pills at once?” Shockingly, he responded by turning his head to one side and looking at me with cuteness and confusion, wondering if I were asking him something he wanted to hear … he hasn’t mastered English language
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Yesterday I did a thing that hasn’t been done in years: I forgot to put my medication in my bag when I left the house. Those who are close to me know that I take a ton of pills and I am taking them what seems like all the time. I have five alarms set
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I can’t write this week. I’ve tried several times. Two or three paragraphs in, it falls apart and the message I meant to speak becomes a ball of words with no real significance. I’m too tangled up inside, I think, to be able to present something linear and coherent on the outside. I’m a mess.
Learning To Be Whole 